Assignment 1, Submission 1 : Formal Letter

Dear Professor Brad,

It is with great enthusiasm that I am writing this letter introducing myself to you. My name is Seah Wang Zhe. I am currently a freshman at the Singapore Institute of Technology, majoring in civil engineering. Having graduated from Ngee Ann Polytechnic with a diploma specialising in civil engineering, it was a matter of course for me to continue pursuing my tertiary studies within the same field of study.

My deeply vested interest in civil engineering came about from a holiday trip to the city of Kobe, Japan, where I had the opportunity to visit and traverse the Akashi Kaikyo Bridge. While travelling through this bridge, my tour bus experienced significant swaying due to tremors from a minor quake that hit the area. Thankfully, the bridge remained structurally stable, and I could cross the bridge safely. I later learned that the Akashi Kaikyo Bridge is one of the world’s most remarkable engineering feats and is structurally designed to withstand earthquakes measuring up to magnitude 8.5. Experiencing the resilience of such an engineering marvel in the face of mother nature sparked my interest in civil engineering.

One weakness I have in communication is in public speaking. I lack confidence in the delivery of my presentation and in keeping my audience engaged. This weakness leads me sometimes to stutter and project my voice too softly.

One strength I have in communication is that I am an active listener, which helps me grasp more information and gain newer perspectives when talking to others. This is especially the case when I listen to the many stories and experiences shared with me by taxi riders during cab rides.

Through this module, I would like to work towards two primary goals. Firstly, I aim to utilise the various lessons to develop my critical thinking skills and be a more effective learner and problem solver. Secondly, I would like to be a more articulate and confident public speaker.

I believe that my open and receptive mindset differentiates me from others. It allows me to embrace constructive criticism, continually self-improve, and have more fruitful group discussions. I am looking forward to making great strides in your effective communication module!

Best Regards,

Wang Zhe


Comments

  1. Dear Wang Zhe,

    I have read your letter and I am glad to know more about you. The letter is clear, concrete and complete. However, there are certain errors I would like to point out:

    1. When addressing the Professor, you should address him by his surname, Blackstone. Hence, Professor Blackstone would be appropriate as a label.
    2. The phrase "this weakness leads me sometimes to stutter" sounds rather strange, perhaps you could phrase it differently?

    With these being said, the letter is well done and I am delighted to hear more about your civil engineering interests.

    Best regards,
    Chester Tang

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good Day Chester,

      Thank you for reading my letter and giving feedback. I am glad that this letter has helped you get to know me better. See you in class!

      Warmest Regards,
      Wang Zhe

      Delete
  2. Dear Wang Zhe,

    I think your letter is very interesting and well structured. I like how you provide examples to elaborate on your points. Also, the language you have used in your letter was good. Glad to know you better. See you in class!

    Best regards,
    Yumeme

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Yumeme,

      Thank you for taking the time to read and give feedback on my letter. Appreciate the kind words written, and I am glad this letter has helped you get to know me better. See you in class!

      Warmest Regards,
      Wang Zhe

      Delete
  3. Dear Wang Zhe,

    After reading your letter, I truly liked it. When you started out by using the words "with great enthusiasm", it sets the tone of your letter in a positive way and it leaves the reader a good impression of you. However, there is a mistake regarding your sentence structure when you were describing your weakness in the letter. Try to use more connectors like "and, or, in addition, etc." Overall, good effort and I enjoyed reading your letter. Looking forward to knowing you better!

    With regards,
    Gabriel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Gabriel,

      Thank you for reading my letter and giving your feedback. I am glad that you enjoyed reading my letter. See you in class!

      Best Regards,
      Wang Zhe

      Delete
  4. Dear Wang Zhe,

    Thank you for this articulate, finely detailed letter. It's clear, succinct and highly informative. You do a very fine job addressing the assignment brief as you share your educational background and motivation for an interest in engineering, your strength and needs in terms of communication skills and your goals for the module. It was especially fascinating to learn about your trip to Kobe and experience on the bridge. I just wonder about your age at that time and marvel at how you had processed the swaying in such a positive, cathartic manner.

    As mentioned, this letter is fluent, thoug there is one sentence you might reconsider in terms of sentence structure:
    -- Having graduated from Ngee Ann Polytechnic with a diploma specialising in civil engineering, it was a matter of course for me to continue pursuing my tertiary studies within the same field of study. > (Who graduated?) ?

    I look forward to learning more about you this term.

    Cheers,

    Brad


    ReplyDelete

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